lemon pop-tart

Part of being a grown-up is learning to understand that is it not all about you. Part of being a fully-formed, well-balanced, individual is being able to assess and accept what motivates others, and indeed understand that mostly people behave with the belief they are doing their best. Doing the best. Doing the thing that is best for others, for loved ones, for everyone. Most of the time people are motivated because they care.

Many times in my life I have had to look at a situation, and ask patiently… why are they doing this? What is it that they wish to achieve? Many times in my life I have requested others look at the situation and ask… why?

Do not make your default position one that believes the worst, most harmful thing. Do not unquestioningly assume that others did not assess, research, process, think, share, discuss, hope, wish, cry, pray, before making action. Do not underestimate the goodness, sense, and kindness of others. In difficult situations, it may not be about you. It likely isn’t. It may be a bigger need, an innocent conflict of interests, a misunderstanding. It may be a necessity. A requirement. Time.

Rarely is a harmful, hurtful or harshness implemented lightly.

Take a moment. Breathe through the fear, the anger, the hurt, the indignation. For there will be a moment when you are given the chance to let go, the gift of empathy for those that have caused pain. Think on. Give it acknowledgement. It may be that once in a while there is a wisdom beyond yours.

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